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With the recent headlines of Hostess going out of business,
many people are wondering how a company so old, so ingrained in American pop
culture could close up shop overnight. Well, it’s a sad tail of greed,
mismanagement and indifference, but that’s not what this article is about.
This article is about losing things you love.
So many of us who have a soft spot for mid-20th
century pop have had to endure icon after icon fall from grace, only to be
replaced by plastic-y, cookie cutter crap and chain-restaurant-ish dullsville
blobs of made-in-China neveau detritus. From the demolition of almost all of
America’s grand Tiki restaurants, to the destruction of the great movie
palaces; from the downfall of America’s greatest music to its bubblegum-pop hip
hop noise; we’ve seen way too many of the things that helped make America the
great country it is get plowed down and swept away to make room for cardboard
casinos and mislabeled “healthy” vitamin waters.
Hostess pies, Devil Dogs, and yes, Twinkies – although,
let’s face it, they are crap too, have stood the test of time, and have been
with us our entire lives. Personally, I’m not a big Twinkie fan. But I do enjoy
a Devil Dog now and then (our wedding cake was made from them...long story, for
another post) and like to splurge on a Hostess apple pie when I want my sugar
count to soar to give my doctor a premature heart attack.
But there is one thing that I cannot live without.
Wonder Bread.
I know, I know, many of you will say it’s the nutritional
equivalent of eating Elmer’s glue and White Out. I don’t care. It’s the only
bread I can eat a PB&J on. And it’s because that’s what I’ve always had my
PB&J on, from when I was a little kid in the 1970s...you know, back when
bread was bread, and Moms bought Wonder Bread because it tasted good and had
the fun polka dots on the bag.
With Hostess making headlines last week as they close the company, apparently shutting their doors forever and denying future generations of Twinkies and Devil Dogs, something occured to me:
I can’t imagine a world without Wonder Bread.
The good news is, I probably won’t have to. In today’s
society, there is a BIG difference between a successful BRAND and successful
company. The company, run by a flock of
who-the-hell-cares-as-long-as-our-bottom-line-stays-high investment firms, is worthless. The brand, however, is worth billions.
What I’m getting at is that just because Hostess the company goes out of
business, it doesn’t mean Hostess the brand will go away.
Think about Monopoly, the game that’s been around since the
1930s. It was originally made by Parker Brothers games. Do you think Parker
Bros. is still making Monopoly? Nope. Parker Brothers became part of General
Mills, which merged it with Kenner, which was bought out by Tonka, which was in
turn bought out by Hasbro. Still the same Monopoly, just a different company building it.
Same thing goes with a candy bar I really dig. I think it’s
a Philly/Jersey area thing, or at least used to be, because few people I talk
to in Florida ever heard of Goldenberg’s Peanut Chews. They disappeared about
10 years ago when a new company (Just Born) bought them out. They dropped the
Goldenberg’s name, and sales fell. But they wised up...the brought the name back,
and now I can buy Goldenberg’s Peanut Chews again, just like I did 30 years
ago.
So will it be a world without Wonder Bread? I don’t think
so. I have a feeling that great polka dot packaging and paste-like bread will
be around for a long time. I’m pretty sure Devil Dogs and Twinkies will, too,
possibly even with the name “Hostess” blazoned in red lettering across the top
of the package. In a few years, will anyone remember there was a time when that
“name” stood for a company that went out of business, and caused a blip on the
news headlines of 2012? Probably not.
-Christopher Pinto, author of
Murder Behind The Closet Door
Murder on Tiki Island
Tiki Lounge Talk
